(Conrad and Saffron)
I toss my duffel on the bed. It bounces once and settles. Decent mattress. No different from the hotel I stayed in last week, except this bed is done up in blue with white sheets. The last one was brown with white sheets. I notice these things. It’s what I get paid for. So far this hotel is getting a good rating. Ambient temperature is good, the drapes are drawn and the TV remote is easy to find. Check check check.
I need a new job. I don’t mind staying in hotels, but it’s getting tedious staying in hotels alone. Saffron can’t be following me around to every major and minor centre in the province checking to see if the towels are folded neatly.
They are. Two large towels. I’ll only need one, and that’s a pity. Saffron would look so good coming out of the shower, dark red hair wet and curling up around her face, wearing nothing but a nice, pure white hotel towel. She would have the smoothest skin, rosy from the hot water, and as always her legs would go on for miles.
I can’t think about that. I have to finish my checklist. Shampoo, conditioner, shower gel, white rose scent. Saffron would hate that. She likes citrus smells. She comes to bed smelling like a fresh cut lemon, but she tastes much sweeter.
I have to stop thinking about her! Two cups wrapped in plastic, check. Wrapped in plastic makes me think of wrapped in latex. I wish I was wrapped in latex. Being the mystery guest at a hotel is no fun when you’re alone.
Done with work for now, I stow the clipboard and unzip my duffel bag. Maybe if I take a cold shower I can stop thinking about Saffron long enough to fall asleep. I reach in to grab a clean t-shirt and my hand hits something with a sharp corner. That’s funny. I didn’t pack any boxes.
I pull out a bright red box. There’s a picture of a hand on it holding something like a taco. It even says "TacO" on the box. Saffron must have accidentally packed her lunch in my duffel. Uh-oh. She gets cranky when she doesn’t get her lunch. Her forehead crinkles up and she pouts with her soft, pink lips. Makes me want to kiss her.
Wait a second. The box says, “Open-faced stroker.” That’s not the kind of taco you eat.
There’s a note taped to the back of the box. Hey, honey. I don’t want you to get too hungry while you’re away. Try this snack to keep you going until you get back home. Think of me while you’re enjoying this!That’s my girl, always taking care of me. I rip open the box and spread out the TacO on the bedside table. It doesn’t look like much more than a circle with few ridges, but if there’s one thing I know about my Saffron, she does her research. She only buys the best. It’s not as if I need much instruction in what to do – it’s pretty obvious.
There’s another note taped to a packet of “sauce,” which is actually water-based lube. Isn’t this adorable? I love this packaging. It’s so cute!
There’s a little smiley face in pink ink on the note, the kind Saffron always draws when something amuses her. The tiny pink smile on the note even has the same shape as her smile. She smiles a lot, especially after she comes. Some women are all dramatic and emotional, but Saffron gives me a big grin when I make her come. It’s one of the reasons I married her.
She also loves to pack these little surprises for me when I travel, so I won’t forget her. As if I could ever forget Saffron. I strip off my clothes and settle on the bed.
I should probably run the TacO under some warm water first before I wrap it around my meat, but then I remember last month at her parents’ cottage.
Skinny dipping in the moonlight, and when we get out of the water she’s shivering. “I’m so cold, baby. You must be freezing.”
Even though the water is so cold it should make me shrivel, I’m rock hard from watching Saffron swimming naked in the lake, like a mermaid with her wild hair and long, slender body.
I open the packet and cold lube squirts onto me. It’s bracing.
Saffron crawls across the dock, naked in the moonlight. “I need you to warm me up, baby.”
I smear the rest of the lube on the ridges and put the taco in my hand. My fingers fit perfectly in the grooves on the other side.
Saffron crawls right on top of me, kissing me. “I need you to warm me from the inside out.” She’s cold. There are goosebumps on her skin, which looks even paler in the moonlight. She’s usually so hot but after this swim, she’s even a bit chilly inside at
first.
I wrap the cool TacO around me.
She makes a little noise, like a coo. “Rub it inside me and I’ll heat up in no time.”
I stroke once and the ridges on the TacO make me forget all about the temperature. The texture is fantastic, and I can squeeze it as hard as I want, which is pretty hard because Saffron is so tight when she sits down on me. After a half dozen strokes and the TacO heats up almost as much as Saffron does.
The grooves on the other side of the TacO give me perfect control. I put a little twist to it as I stroke and can practically feel the wood under my back and the wet heat of Saffron around me. This is great – the next best thing to being there!
I speed up my stroking and in no time. Saffron bounces on me and tilts her head back in the moonlight. A huge grin spreads across her gorgeous face as she comes around my, by this time, burning hot meat.
I give the TacO one last squeeze and I’m there, coming on the dock, trying to be quiet, with Saffron laughing and grinning. “Don’t worry, no one will hear. And if they do, I don’t even care.”
I yell out her name when I come in the hotel room, and I don’t care if anyone hears either.
Damn, that was good one good TacO. I may have to rest a bit before having seconds.
