Going The Distance: How Can Men Last Longer in Bed?

Going The Distance: How Can Men Last Longer in Bed?

We all want to last longer in bed! Who doesn’t? We all want longer lovemaking sessions with earth-shattering orgasms that leave us thinking about them for days to come. However, there are just so many factors involved in being able to last as long or longer than our partners, but this article will arm you with all the knowledge you need for your ultimate performance control.

What is premature ejaculation?

Premature ejaculation can be summarized by not having control over when you climax. It can also coincide with ejaculating earlier than desired during stimulation or intercourse. Premature ejaculation can also be a diagnosed condition if you are consistently having this issue and are interested in seeking medical intervention.

What causes premature ejaculation?

The biggest contributing factors to premature ejaculation are:

• Overstimulation: This can happen to anyone regardless of stimulus. Overstimulation happens when we are overwhelmed with sensations and regardless of technique cannot stop ejaculation. Overstimulation is an important part of achieving an orgasm, but gaining control over when we want to ejaculate is the goal.
• Mood: Variance in mood, experiencing bouts of sadness or depression can impact sex for anyone often leading to premature ejaculation, or no ejaculation at all.
• Hormonal Imbalance: Testosterone distribution in the body as well as abnormality in neurotransmission can also impact performance control. Often antidepressants as well as other medications can impact hormonal regulation. If this is a consistent concern we advise talking to a medical professional for more options.
• Stress: Stress can play a huge part in reducing the mental and physical energy we have left for intercourse. It can especially impact performance if we are stressed about premature ejaculation and experiencing a lot of anxiety and poor self-esteem surrounding performance.

Feeling overwhelmed? No need to stress, there are twice as many techniques to aid in overcoming premature ejaculation and owning your performance control.

Techniques and Tools:

Practice Male Kegels

Kegel exercises benefit your overall pelvic floor health. By strengthening these muscles, you can improve urinary function and learn to withhold your ejaculation from overcoming you. To practice this exercise, tighten your pelvic floor muscles that you would use to stop a stream of urine, hold the contraction for three seconds, and then relax for three seconds. By doing three sets of five to ten reps a day over time you can increase the strength of these muscles. Use them to prevent ejaculation by performing them during intercourse when you feel close to orgasm. Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles can also lead to better, stronger erections as they increase circulation to the pelvic floor, and intensify your orgasms!

Masturbating and Edging

During masturbation, edging is a technique where you pause stimulation when you’re about to climax, wait until you’ve reset your sensitivity, and start stroking again. In a session people will work up to edging longer and longer to practice performance control during intercourse. Use a stroker or masturbation toy to simulate penetrative sex for even better practice. Edging can also bring men stronger, more intense orgasms so we can’t recommend this enough!

Bring Toys into the Mix!

Sex toys and tools can enhance your sex life with yourself and partners in countless ways, but they can also help you go the distance! Excellent sex tools for lasting longer in bed are:

Cock Rings: Penis rings are worn once you are erect and act as a rubber band physically preventing the blood or sperm from leaving the genitals. You can wear them around the base of the penis, around the penis and testicles, just the balls, or all three. They provide you with a comfortable lifted feeling and the benefit of using them on the balls or the shaft and balls is that it will draw the balls further away from the body, increasing the time it takes sperm to travel out the vas deferens.

Condoms & Penis Sleeves: These can act as barriers reducing sensation between you and your partner. Penis sleeves are often a great option as they can also give even more stimulation to your partner with texture and vibration, while reducing warmth and stimulus for you.

Genital Desensitizers: Desensitization products are a godsend for people who are tired of being overstimulated during penetration. They can be sprays or creams that have a low percentage of lidocaine or benzocaine to reduce sensation when applied to the penis. They can take some trial and error to figure out how much is idea, but ultimately they are a serious upgrade when enhancing your sexual performance.

Change it Up and Switch it Up!

Switching positions during intercourse can help you pause and reset your sensitivity. The best positions for lasting longer in bed are always going to do a couple of things:

1. They don't rely on thrusting or penetration at all, limiting how fast you become aroused.
2. They don't allow as long or as deep of a thrust, preventing you from becoming overstimulated.
3. They are difficult to perform, so your attention is on maintaining the position rather than the sensations in your penis.
4. They put you in the driver's seat, allowing you to control how much stimulation you receive and keep you from sailing over the edge.
5. They prioritize her pleasure, which usually involves less vigorous thrusting and more clitoral grinding.

The Top Best Positions for Lasting Longer in Bed Are:

1. Non-Penetrative Missionary:

   Lie on top of your partner as in normal missionary, but do not penetrate her. Instead, rub the back of the penis against her vulva, clitoris, and perineum. Most people never think to try this form of "outercourse," but it can be a godsend for men who come too quickly. There's still a lot of wetness and warmth, but the sensation is focused on the less sensitive back of the penis, not the front of the shaft and the head, where the most orgasmic stimulation comes from. She loves it because she can grind her clit against the shaft. Most men can find a form of missionary sex that they can easily maintain, regardless of their fitness and flexibility.

   
   

2. Spooning

   Both partners lie on their sides, your front pressing against her back like the spooning cuddle position. You're the big spoon, she the little spoon. Your partner should separate her legs a little. Find her vagina with your hand, and enter her from the rear. The strokes available to you in this position will be very short, preventing you from making the long wild thrusts that push most men past the point of no return. The short strokes target her G-spot, making it a great one for her. Focus on grinding your hips against her butt, and consider stimulating her clitoris with your fingers. If you can bring her to orgasm, it's easier to feel good about your own orgasm whenever it happens.

   
   

3. Side By Side

   This is similar to spooning, but the partners face each other. Lying on your sides face to face, your partner lifts the free leg and wraps it around your hip, giving your hips access to her vagina. Both partners control how deep they thrust, resulting in a sex position that is both active and passive for both partners. The man relinquishes some control, allowing him to focus on sensations while limiting how much he can thrust. You’re still lying down, so you won't have to tap out or anything. The challenge here is coordinating your thrusts and working as a team.

   
   

4. Seated Missionary

   The man sits on the bed or the floor, and the woman straddles his hips, facing him, allowing him to enter her from the front. This position has the advantage of being hard to maintain.

   The man can't thrust indiscriminately while holding himself up and his partner in position. It's a very intimate position, great for pleasing your partner and getting feedback from her reactions. This position is awkward to maintain, especially if you have tight hamstrings or hips. If you can't touch your toes, you might find yourself having to prop yourself up on your hands or tuck your legs if you can't extend them fully. Either way, this position teeters on the verge of collapse.

   
   

5. Grinding Missionary

   Missionary is one of the easiest positions to lose control of because you're doing all the thrusting and have access to deep penetration. Grinding missionary flips the position on its head by requiring you to thrust your penis deep and leave it there, grinding your hips against hers.

   Without the long, intense thrusts, it's easier to keep your penis from being overstimulated. Meanwhile, your partner will love the front-action grinding. It rubs her clit while filling her vagina fully.

Final Thoughts

It’s important to remember that premature ejaculation is very common, but easily prevented through plenty of pleasurable means. The techniques, positions, and strategies listed above are just a start, and like any hobby, practice makes perfect. On your own you have all the tools at your threshold to literally take your performance into your own hands and work towards better performance control.